Finishing the thought...
While the overall feeling is of joyful sorrow, I do notice that sorrow is still sorrow.
By that I mean that in the moments where I feel deeply the sense of loss and transition, there is still grief. It is just followed by moments of pride and moments of joy, knowing that my son is so very happy and successful.
But sorrow is still sorrow.
The reason I write is not to inspire, nor to share stories for the sake of sharing stories.
The reason I write and share is to convey the concept of harmony.
And, the truth about harmony is that we live life through its moments.
The moments are the bricks. The moments are what we live. Where we feel stress, or joy, or grief.
I didn't feel any moments of "joyful sorrow". That is the overall taste of this moment. It's the flavor of this transition. But, it's made up of small little bites.
Why is this important?
Because in the moments of grief, I notice that I am a little angry. I notice my tone with my other boys. I notice my energy lower. I notice my desire fade. I notice my heart hurt.
And, if I let that moment linger too long, it begets more grief, and moments of disharmony... "wishing" the moment was different.
So, I navigate through those moments and choose the next moment reminding myself of joy. And, slowly feeling it again.
While it is very true that multiple things are true at once. I am not sure that multiple emotions are felt "in a single moment". That is nice actually. We get to taste the flavors purely in each moment.
And, harmony suggests, moments beget moments.
The reason I share is not simply to share, but to understand better the concepts of harmony.
You find yourself in a moment, and you think about the "absolute truth" of the IS of the moment. And, its from that truth that you point yourself toward your want.
And, you need to remember your want.
I want my son to have an amazing life, to stretch himself and to create the very best and biggest version of himself, and make the world a better place for his having been in it... I want him to know joy, satisfaction and meaningful success...
That's the want.
It's the want that makes wishing anything was different fade...
Life is fluid and dynamic... and harmony is the sound, the emotion, the energy we create from living it.
We create it and consume it at the same time.
So very simple.
So very complicated.
Joyful sorrow... and sorrow is still sorrow... and joy is still joy...
Yours in harmony,
Nestor