Momentary Disharmony!
It’s been a great week. I don’t know exactly why, but I think it might be because very little was “due” and a lot was “being worked”.
Due dates drive disharmony.
Due dates make us wish for more time, make us wish for a better product, make us wish we could prioritize better… and thus disharmony.
Not sure how to solve this other than continue to try to ONLY PUT DUE DATES on things that MATTER and continue to eliminate what doesn’t.
Probably better stated is not only put due dates on the things that matter, but on the things THAT I SHOULD BE OWNING! The things that I don’t put dates on still matter in many, many cases… they just need to be on someone else’s due date calendar!
I FEEL the disharmony come and go through the moments.
I think about getting the budget done, and I feel great about the conversations and the progress. And, then, my wife mentions the basketball game that I’d like to go to, and my harmony is tweaked. And, then I think about the dinner that I am making for some good friends this weekend, and the fact that I have to buy the food, and make the list, and cook it, and find time to work on the numbers… and I feel a twinge.
If I just think about the dinner – I look forward to cooking and really showing our friends a good time.
Last night, I went food shopping with my older sons and we had a blast. I had heard someone earlier in the day saying, “I HATE to go to the grocery store.” I remember thinking to myself, of all of the things to “HATE” I would never waste that energy hating that… and how wonderful is it to go and explore the store where you can find treats for the family, and food! How can you HATE that?
Regardless, not only did I not hate going to the store last night. I LOVED IT! We had some great conversations with my boys in the car. We laughed. We were together. And, I got some shopping done.
Anyway, back to my train of thought.
If I think about the dinner… I am in harmony and excited.
If I think about finishing the budget… I am in harmony and excited.
If I think about seeing my son play basketball… I am in harmony and excited.
If I think about leading next week’s exec meetings… I am in harmony and excited…
AND, THEN I start thinking about them together, and momentary anxiety happens… because they all have deadlines.
So, I switch back to… What am I doing right now to make them happen? And, I focus on one, and I smile and move.
But, this is a fluid and constant flow of thought. From harmony to disharmony and back.
And, if I pay attention, the disharmony comes when I feel like I am going to potentially over-compromise one in order to achieve the other. “I wish I could focus more on X. Or, I am worried that I will fail on Y.”
It’s life.
I don’t really know how to stop the flow.
But, what I do is I “ZOOM OUT”… I know that I will get the budget done. I will do whatever it takes. And, I will be ready for the exec meeting, though not as ready as I will wan to be. And, the dinner will be great… because for some reason, we always seem to make them work… and I won’t miss my son’s basketball game, because those are limited opportunities…
I know that I will navigate the next few days…
I know that these are luxuries and blessings that I am navigating between, and I should be grateful for all of them…
So, when I zoom out, I realize that disharmony is silly and ungrateful… it’s wasted energy and peace of mind.
And, then I come back into the navigation realizing that I am navigating through a version of Disneyworld and trying to figure out what rides to ride… what shows to see… how could that be the source of disharmony?
And, I jump between activities with a spring in my step… and it allows me to jump more graciously, more gratefully, and thus happier and in greater harmony…
If you allow yourself to stay in the minutia... in the momentary and tactical roller coaster... the little ups and downs turn our stomach... If you ZOOM OUT... you realize you are flying high, living large and so very, very fortunate...
Be selective and deliberate about the due dates that you set for yourself on the tactical minutia…
ZOOM OUT - ENJOY THE AMAZING VIEW and then ZOOM IN and BRING IT in the moment...
Yours in harmony,
Nestor
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