Perhaps I have written about this before...
But, it certainly feels important enough to write again.
I was having a great conversation over a glass of wine, with a friend whose mother recently died, and she said... "Watching her die... it begs the question so clearly...
'What Matters?'"
It made me think of the moment standing above my father's casket...
holding his hand which felt so familiar, despite the chemical smells of preservatives in the air.
(Side note - I feel like I can draw my father's hands... I can picture them in such complete detail... I can touch them with my mind... They were small & delicate & deliberate when it came to cutting his food. I miss him... still... more than I ever imagined that I would)
So anyway, I am holding his hand standing by his casket...
and the words pounding on my head,
"It doesn't matter how you die,
it matters how you live,
it matters how you live..."
Those words just kept playing in my mind over and over.
What matters? to me?
I know the answer...
CONNECTION...
knowing people, seeing people, connecting with people... with their stories... with their needs... with their fears... with their dreams...
CONNECTION matters above all else...
Because when we CONNECT... we are most alive... our purpose lives... and we feel joy.
CONNECTION matters... everything we do, arguably, we do to CONNECT... to be seen, to be worthy... of connection...
And, don't "limit" connection to only a "touchy feely" thing that happens in romantic relationships... REALIZE, CELEBRATE, EMBRACE that connection CAN happen ALL the time with EVERYBODY...
CONNECTION is a warm greeting... it's acknowledging a strangers eyes on the street... it's a nod... it's listening... it's pausing... it's hearing... it's taking a small moment to ACKNOWLEDGE people... individually... ACKNOWLEDGE their BEING...
EVERY exchange is an opportunity for connection...
EVERY exchange is an opportunity for harmony...
And, if what matters in life is CONNECTION... then every moment we don't connect in some form creates the possibility of a moment of disharmony... "wishing we connected"...
Think about it...
We are constantly bouncing between harmony and disharmony on some level, and I would strongly argue that it correlates meaningfully and materially with how we bounce between connecting and not connecting with others...
CONNECTION is powerful... the energy from connecting lasts and lingers... but does dissipate between human beings without resupplying it...
So, that is "what matters?" in my opinion.
And, what is my purpose in life? What makes my life matter?
I believe that my purpose in life is
To live and share the joy of connection...
to help everyone I know live a little bit more in the moment, to think a little deeper, to see their dreams a little more possible...
I want to make the world around me to breathe a little deeper, smile a little bigger, to believe in themselves a little bit more...
because I believe we possess that energy but are very often unaware of it. That is the energy that we all control, that we all seek... and it is our collective energy of making our lives and the world better... that allows the world to continue to spin in the right direction...
in the direction of love...
of knowing that we are not alone...
that we are all,
indeed,
connected...
because that IS what matters...
Breathe deep...
Smile big...
Feel it?
in harmony,
Nestor