So - this is my first TBT post of 2019 and one of my favorites, “HUGS”…
On the one hand, there is the truth that at our core we seek connection, and nothing connects us like a HUG! It dissolves the space, the awkwardness, the noise between people - all be it for a moment. And, that is why we should be present in that moment!
On the other hand, the concept of harmony is that it happens when we “embrace” the IS of our moment - and a hug is both the physical and emotional embrace of the IS… It brings the core / start of the concept of harmony to life… EMBRACE the IS, EMBRACE the people you care about… It all starts there… It refuels us in a way that nothing else can…
Don’t take hugs lightly… don’t sprint past them… look forward to them, anticipate them, be present in them…
ORIGINAL POST
At the core of HARMONY is embracing the “IS” of the moment. And, there is nothing that captures the emotion of embracing the IS, like a simple embrace, or in more common words, a HUG!
A friend posted on facebook this morning from a page called “Beloved Festival”…
"The average length of a hug between two people is 3 seconds, but researchers have discovered something fantastic. When a hug lasts 20 seconds, there is a therapeutic effect on the body and mind.
The reason is that a sincere hug produces a hormone called "oxytocin", also known as the love hormone. This substance has many benefits in our physical andmental health, helps us, among other things, to relax, to feel safe and calm our fears and anxiety.
This wonderful calming is offered free of charge every time we have a person in our arms, when we cradled a child, cherish a dog or cat, we're dancing with our partner, the closer we get to someone or just hold the shoulders of a friend."
There is something special about a warm and lasting hug. It can so quickly change the mood of any relationship or conversation. It can change the entire nature of a simple hello.
I love to hug. I love to hug Susy. I love to hug my boys. I love to hug friends.
I notice the awkwardness that you sometimes feel in a hug. Notice the thoughts that go through your head…
“Is anyone looking at me?”
“Should I be letting go now?”
“Is this silly?”
What is it that makes us want to pull away from a hug so quickly?
Maybe on some level, we are thinking, “Do I deserve this?”
While I love hugging everyone I care about… there is a special awareness I have in hugging my boys.
I remember when the boys where little and having one of their rare but intense fits, I would hug them tight. They would squirm and push away, and I would just hug them. A little later they would settle in and relax into the moment… they would then hug me back and their fit would end.
A hug resets us. A hug recharges us. A hug takes us and physically brings us into the IS of the moment.
I love that now, as my boys are less boys and more men, we hug more intentionally, we hug more often, and we hug longer.
In an embrace – I believe they sense most clearly and perhaps most naturally my concern for them, my belief in them, my respect for them, my devotion to them, my confidence in them, and my complete love for them.
A hug, a long hug, a willing hug, a lingering hug communicates so much more than words ever can.
A hug forces out all of the noise that is in our heads.
If we can get beyond the awkward initial moment, and relax into it, a hug allows us to feel connected in a way that words alone can never achieve.
Don’t even try to put the feelings of a lingering embrace into words… just allow yourself to own them.
A hug is very much the core of harmony brought to life – in feeling.
So, don’t take hugs for granted. Don’t be conscious of the artificial awkwardness that you might feel in an embrace. (But, do be sensitive to the awkwardness that others may feel. You can’t force anyone unless they are very much toddlers to stay in an embrace.) Just be conscious of not letting go first.
Words, as eloquent and honest as we may say them, will always have to be filtered by our minds, by connotations and noise, by the world…
Hugs reset us and recharge us…
Let the embrace with those you love linger.
HUG OFTEN
HUG TIGHTLY
HUG ALWAYS & DON’T LET GO
with your heart
even after your arms come free!
Nestor