In an "unAmerican" way, I have grown to care less about specific sports teams.
Don't get me wrong. I love sports...
I DO!
But, I got tired of being disappointed.
In my relentless pursuit of harmony, I thought to myself, "If only 1 team out of 32 gets to win the SuperBowl... 31 teams are disappointed every year and 1 isn't... so WHY set myself up for certain disappointment?"
When I cared alot about the Washington Redskins, I would be so angry when they lost... "WISHING" they had played different, etc. It felt so silly to feel that sense of loss and disharmony over something I had no control over.
I know, I know... UnAmerican!
So, I stopped really caring about specific teams. I love to see the Ravens win. I like their personality as a team. I like the energy in most of their games. But, still... I don't let it get to me either way.
I love watching sports - I am just no longer a fan of any specific team. I've been this way for almost 15 or 20 years. It makes life better, or at least I think it does.
And, then, I find myself caring again...
Like that line from Al Pacino in one of his movies, "I keep trying to get out and they keep pulling me back in!"
So, I do enjoy watching the World Cup. Peru has made it easy, because they haven't been in the World Cup since 1982. But, the USA story is fun to watch. The sport is growing, and I am somewhat invested in it through coaching.
So, last night, my family and I were watching the USA vs Portugal game. We didn't know what to expect. It was fun to watch a sporting event together where we were all rooting for the same team.
After the first error and goal. The odds were against us. It was disheartening, but the team wasn't letting up. Love to see that. In fact, they were playing better than I've ever seen them play. Lots of offense. Then, finally with 70 some minutes in -
GOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
It's 1-1. What a fight! What a game!
USA USA USA... It was exciting.
Maybe we can pull this out? They keep fighting...
And, then they are attacking, and, and, and....
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
We did it again... 2-1 against Portugal What a game... How awesome... HOLD THEM!!!!
It was a grueling final 10 minutes... but we were doing it. I was still a little concerned... but it looked good... it was just a little bit of energy that we let up. Bradley gets knocked off the ball beyond midfield. Ronaldo starts running down the sideline. The defender just a step behind. The cross is beautiful. Howard (Goalie) stays in the goal (I DONT get that!), and the defender is just a step behind... and
BAMMMMM! It's 2-2 and with literally probably 10 seconds left... the game ends in a draw!
A wonderful performance by the US Soccer team. Proud of them. Very proud. But so wishing it wasn't so... trying to keep it all in appropriate context. I can't imagine how they feel. They were about to advance... about to make history... and BAMMMM...
That is sport. That is great sport.
So, I felt the HIGH after the second goal... and then I felt the low after the Portugal equalizer.
And, I thought.
Can you feel the highs in life without the lows?
I live my life trying to do just that. I want to feel the high of harmony, without the lows of disharmony.
I have a few good friends who tell me that is not possible.
And, after last night, I think they are right. To feel the high of the US winning, I had to become vulnerable to the reality that they might not hold on to it, and now may not quality for the final 16. Or they might.
Ultimately, in sport... It really doesn't matter... and yet - to some (like the crazy men in San Francisco - they crippled an opposing fan after the game in a stupid fight because he was wearing the other team's jersey).
SO - two thoughts on harmony - as a result of the amazing and disappointing but so exciting tie yesterday by the US team....
1. WHAT ULTIMATELY MATTERS is what we ALLOW TO MATTER. There are some things that have alot more "meaning" than others in the absolute sense of the term. But, with respect to each other. With respect to UNDERSTANDING each other - what matters to us matters... even if we disagree on what that is. If we are to be respectful of each other. If we hope to embrace each other's absolute truth. IF we hope to achieve harmony, we must accept what matters to those around us, even if it doesn't matter to us!
Ignoring it - means ignoring them - and it makes harmony impossible. This is a tough concept. Tough to understand and tough to embrace. But, essential if we are to achieve harmony. This doesn't mean that we cannot "challenge it constructively", but the challenge must come with the acceptance that it is indeed important and not trivial.
2. WE MUST BE WILLING TO FEEL DEFEAT IF WE WANT TO FEEL VICTORY... WE MUST BE WILLING TO FEEL DISHARMONY IF WE ASPIRE TO FEEL HARMONY The VERY IMPORTANT detail is that we must work to have the discipline to MOVE ON from disharmony and from defeat quickly and swiftly and get back into the next moment back into a mode of achieving victory - and harmony.
I used to think we had to avoid it at all costs... and I get how that is naive. It is not that I don't feel disharmony. I do, all the time. It is that I work hard to move on from it quickly... and in the next moment be open again to harmony. In the next moment, be ready and willing and mindful of anchoring in gratitude and moving toward the harmony and the victory we seek.
We must be willing to lose - but we cannot stay in the loss.
We must be willing to hurt - but we cannot stay in the hurt.
We must be willing to be vulnerable, to have meaning, to experience joy and happiness and satisfaction... We must be willing to LOSE in the moment... and we must be committed to WINNING in the very next moment... and every moment thereafter.
That is harmony.
The absolute truth is that we won't win every time...
The absolute truth is that we need to be grateful just to be in the game...
And, the game of life will come with blows, disappointments, heart brake. set backs, and pain... That is the truth. But, it will also come with victory, happiness, blessings, sunrises and sunsets, and love...
See it all - be mindful of where you are in every moment- and when you are in the dark... step choicefully back into the light.
GO USA!!!
GO U!
Yours in harmony,
Nestor