Message to my team this morning...
"WARM CANDOR... "
Oh - we are going to follow up on that thought! What a perfect descrpitor to harmony...
Folks:
There is so much great content on the internet… so much wonderful energy for us to explore, embrace and apply.
This weekend I listened to a podcast called “We Study Billionaires” and they were interviewing Daniel Coyle who wrote the book, “Culture Code”.
I tend to stay away from talking about culture by itself, because so many cringe when I do… and the ones who don’t most often already “get it” fairly well. I try to work our conversations regarding culture into “the work” – the stuff we do everyday that defines who we are in more understandable and pragmatic terms.
The book “Culture Code” seems very inspired and it is the result of Daniel Coyle interviewing extremely successful companies who have both great culture and great success overall. Two of my favorite quotes from the 50 minute podcast:
- “GROUPS THAT HIDE WEAKNESSES FROM THEMSELVES WILL NEVER BE STRONG
GROUPS THAT SHARE WEAKNESSES ARE STRONG BECAUSE OF IT…”
Ed Catmull
- There is a certain reaction… some people look for brutal honesty.., and that is a culture of brutality… the successful way to have it is not “Brutal truth” but warm candor… don’t just send the truth in a brutal way… you always have that tethered to a signal of connection…
Daniel Coyle
- Great culture is not about magical chemistry… its about clarity. Its about sending really clear signals… about where we are and where we are headed.. and about being connected… about sharing information… vulnerability loops… We are not going there – we are going HERE!
Daniel Coyle
Below were some of his highlights from the podcast that struck me as “absolute truths”… help me bring them into the conversations at EMG… let’s keep making connection happen better and better…
- The whole opportunity from culture is to move people from the “outside” to the “inside”.
- Companies with “great culture” have an “energy” about them that comes from “connection”… how do the achieve that?
- Most adults spend a lot of their energy in “status management”… contemplating how they “fit in to the world”, and thinking about “how others view them”.
- “If you can create safety in your group … if you can create the sense of belonging and safety where then you get rid of status management, then you can have a group that truly adds up to more than the sum of its parts…”
- “Where are we managing status…? where are we solving problems together… and not worrying about who is in charge and what people think of us.? Great question to be mindful of when we are in conversations… “are we solving the problem or are we seeking safety in some form?”
- TUNE INTO IT… look for where connection is happening and where its not.
- “Cultural Magic” looks kind of chaotic. You cant tell who is in charge because no one is in charge, they are working together solving problems…” “people trade leadership… one leads and then another one jumps in… its one of the most powerful things you can do to build culture.”
- “Belonging happens in these moments where we get a crystal clear signal we are connected – I see you – we are not managing status in that moment – we are expressing a social connection with our behavior.”
- “The moment you enter a group is by far the most important moment you have in that group… at Pixar… you go into the auditorium and sit in the 5th row… and he says, “whatever you did before – you are a movie maker now… we need you!” Everyone gets to comment… from across the company… THAT builds connection and brings people “inside”.
- “That’s how our brains our built.. Our brains are built to worry about connection ALL THE TIME, and question our connection to groups, even when we know logically when we are well connected. These groups have mastered the communication to the deep brain – the part that is constantly worried about our connection to the group… they are sending that message over and over again that we are connected…”
- SOCIOMETRICS – measurements of effective connections
- ALL GREAT HIGH PERFORMING GROUPS HAVE THE SAME SOCIOMETRIC PRINT…
- EVERYONE TALKS TO EVERYONE… (no silos, no hierarchy)… you want everyone talking to everyone… sociometric TRUTH… as a leader you are the burner underneath the pot… making sure that it all blends together… and collides with each other.
- (As a leader…) If my organization was a greenhouse, “I am not the plant that everyone wants to be like – “not to be the ideal / model person”… I need to be the architect of the greenhouse… I have to let the sunshine and the soil and the water in and I need to let what is going to happen happen.. DESIGNER OF SOCIAL INTERACTION was really powerful…”
- YOU DON’T HAVE TO CHOOSE BETWEEN EXCELLENCE AND BELONGING… You need to give people both… and demand both.
Give them the absolute peak moment of care and connection and love…
And that kind of combination is revelatory… we typically see those two things as a trade-off.
You can tell people the truth because / WHEN you love them to death…
- As cheesy as it sounds, great cultures have MANTRAS… people repeat the mantras… it feels like you are at summer camp…
But the fact that everyone is sharing the same mental models, the same mantras… makes a difference… They become your north star.
(Walking toward our MOUNTAIN is / should be one of our MANTRAS) it…
- It’s the act of creating it and sharing it that makes it powerful… it’s not putting a poster on the wall… its constantly sharing it…
- Vulnerability in leadership / in culture is HUGE!
- “GROUPS THAT HIDE WEAKNESSES FROM THEMSELVES WILL NEVER BE STRONG
GROUPS THAT SHARE WEAKNESSES ARE STRONG BECAUSE OF IT…”
Ed Catmull
- Dave Cooper trained troops that got BinLaden… 4 most powerful words a leader can say, “I screwed that up”…
- We live in a world, where problems are fast moving and very complex – the idea that one person can be certain about what to do is ridiculous… rather than the team on the ground…
- This idea of vulnerability (of saying “I don’t know what you should do) is the most powerful way that an organization can ignite the sharing of information.
- Vulnerability is not about mushy emotions – its about sharing information. If you are open about the mistakes you make… you create a better model. These vulnerability habits… AAR (after action review) – navy seals… they are awkward… they are painful and emotional – and they are most important…
- That awkward, difficult… “I screwed that up”.. that awkwardness is how we grow… how we come together… how we build trust…
- There is a certain reaction… some people look for brutal honesty.., and that is a culture of brutality… the successful way to have it is not “Brutal truth” but warm candor… don’t just send the truth in a brutal way… you always have that tethered to a signal of connection…
- Great culture is not about magical chemistry… its about clarity. Its about sending really clear signals… about where we are and where we are headed.. and about being connected… about sharing information… vulnerability loops… We are not going there – we are going HERE!
So much great information… so much room to grow.
Explore. Embrace. Apply.
Happy Monday! Let’s KICK IT!
in harmony,
Nestor