This whole thing about harmony is a selfish thing…
It’s an interpretation of various philosophies and approaches to life that I found useful.
Ultimately, while it’s the same thing,
it’s more about deliberately working our way OUT of DISHARMONY,
moreso than working our way INTO Harmony.
While they are both one and the same,
If you are already in harmony, you probably aren’t joining this conversation.
And, if you think you are in a state of harmony,
then you may not be aware of accepting of the idea that harmony is not a “state”
but a momentary emotion…
I don’t think we achieve an on-going state, I think we are always in flux…
Harmony, to me, is not a state, but a discipline… an awareness and deliberateness to the moments we live.
So, why is it more about getting OUT of disharmony?
Because my impetus in defining it for myself was driven by two realities…
I wanted to figure out how to balance accepting and being grateful for the “IS” of my life… my reality, and
I wanted get away from “WISHING” my life away… from spending so many of my moments
in a state of “WISHING” my life was already different, “WISHING” that I had already achieved
things that I hadn’t achieved…
The impetus for the concept of harmony came from the desire to NOT live in “disharmony”… or that icky feeling that I had (and have still all too often) in moments where I wish things were different.
I am sharing this because I want you to think about your days… How much of your day do you spend wishing your life was different, your weight was different, your house was different, your kids were different, your spouse was different, your job was different… not “different” necessarily in being completely different, but being in a different state of evolution, or maturity, or behavior, or detail… ?
All of those moments wishing are LOST… and POINTLESS… and yet, I would argue, we spend so many of our moments in that state… the state of DISHARMONY.
It is in acknowledging that ickiness, that our desire and commitment to be more aware is born… it is from the dislike of DISHARMONY that our desire and deliberateness for harmony comes from.
I think ultimately, we need to BOOKEND our days, our moments with GRATITUDE… That is the ONLY way, I believe, to move more systemically to HARMONY (and away from DISHARMONY).
Gratitude is the force that moves us from disharmony to harmony…
The moment that we are grateful for a moment, for a relationship, for a job… we stop wishing it was different… The moment we are grateful for it, we accept it…
And, then in that moment we can from a place of acceptance consider how we WANT to evolve it or transform it into something beyond what it is…
And, then we come back to gratitude as we enter the next moment…
We must bounce from gratefulness to gratefulness and consider how to evolve our reality as we go…
DISHARMONY is not a bad word.
The moment we start to beat ourselves up for being in it, we prolong it.
The moment we deny that we are often in it, we limit our passion for opting out of it.
The moment we WISH we weren’t in it… we are in it.
Ironically, we almost have to ACCEPT that disharmony is part of the process, part of life… in order to WANT harmony and take action and think differently for harmony.
I need to stop beating myself up for not living “up to” a life of harmony in every moment, because in those moments I am WISHING I was different or already evolved moreso than I am…
Buddhism says that “suffering” is an essential part of life. Well, maybe it means that “DISHARMONY” and “WISHING” is an essential part of “HARMONY”, and it’s accepting it as part of the process that allows us and motivates us to transcend it.
And, we transcend it by bookending our moments with gratefulness…
Gratitude is ALWAYS there… always an option… even in the darkest of corners, in the saddest of moments…
Gratitude is the bookends to harmony… it holds it up… it makes it possible…
Ironic, isn’t it…
Gratitude is the greatest force…
the bookends….
in harmony,
Nestor