What a difference a flight makes…
So, I wrote about my flight friend, Sparkles, earlier this week.
Last night, I had a very different experience…
I had a window seat, which is not usually my style. I am an “aisle” kind-a-guy. I like to come and go as I please.
So there was an older couple in the aisle and middle seat, and I mentioned to them that I had the window. They got up. The woman was on the aisle. The gentleman was in the middle. He did not seem happy to see me. Oh well… we all have to sit somewhere.
We sat down, and I thought to myself. “this guy does not like me”. I felt some disharmony…
Then as we were taking off, I saw him reach over and hold his wife’s hand.
Hmmm… I thought… and as I glanced over, their arms where intertwined.
Maybe I misread him.
I asked him where he was coming from, and he reluctantly said Maryland…
I don’t know why I kept pushing, but I just did…
He mentioned that he and his wife were going to a “leadership conference”…
Interesting...
Before I knew it, we were talking a mile a minute between the three of us. His wife was a therapist. He was an engineer leading development efforts. He had started tagging along with her years ago to these “leadership retreats / conferences”. He had found real value and insight…
One of those conversations that I never expected to evolve the way it did.
His wife had been studying relationship and organizational dynamics for over 3 decades. We exchanged all kinds of notes, and ideas, and resources.
I mentioned, Julio Olalla, to her… A philosopher/coach that I found on you tube, that I have found amazing… and it turns out she has been going to his sessions and working with him since 1980’s.
This video shares a couple of ideas that really struck me… It's 10 minutes long (the last 6 minutes are the best)...
First, the concept that wisdom is a love affair with questions, and knowledge is a love affair with answers. That struck me deeply…
Second, the idea that “questions alone can be your guide”… over time the questions stay the same, the answers change. As long as we are asking the right questions, we will figure out the right path. Don’t worry so much about the answers… keep asking the right questions and do what comes naturally from there.
Third, he shares the idea that conversations should be journeys with unknown destinations... great conversations explore...
Watch it and consider his words deeply...
I was amazed by how eager this couple was to talk and share. I was taken back by their openness and their passion. I loved that her husband shared these experiences with his wife, and had made it his own in his own way. He reminded me a little of Archie Bunker (he is going to kill me if he reads this), and she reminded me of Kattherine Hepburn. She was so intense about the things and concepts that struck her as true and insightful...
We exchanged our favorite books, concepts, authors and coaches... It was like two kids sharing their favorite baseball cards... The fact that we loved Julio Olalla connected us in a strange and unique way...
As I shared the concepts of harmony, and compared and constrasted all of the different philosophies, I was proud. I saw that my understanding of these concepts is rich and robust. I sensed a real connection with this warm and wonderful lady. She talked about Julio Olalla as being delicious. I knew she was my kind of woman.
She fully understood the concept of harmony, and seemed to really appreciate hearing it.
Here was someone who had been studying these concepts for decades, and she was intrigued and inspired in some way by the concept of harmony as explained by the “atom of the moment”. It’s those moments that make me feel like this whole diatribe that I can’t seem to contain has a place in the conversation… it has value and deserves to be heard and explored…
She made me feel like my understanding of the concepts of leadership, organizational health, relationships, parenting was well thought out, insightful, and moving. It made me feel like this is not a waste of time…
As I reflected on this couple, I was impressed with their connection… with their commitment to keep learning… Their connection had gotten closer over time... its not often you see that.
The richness and connection in their lives, compared to the lady I met earlier in the week was powerfully different... It was the difference between light vs dark, the difference between meaning and meaningless, the difference between purpose and purposeless.
What a difference a flight makes... I thought
Insightful living is palpable…
You can feel iwhen people live in harmony…
Never gonna quit! Live for in! Live IN it!
Yours in Harmony,
Nestor