What if I lived today… for today?
I went to college to get a degree. Learning was really a terciary objective at best.
I wanted to get a degree so that I could work and become independent.
I got an Engineering degree because I wanted to be a business man.
(I know… it doesn’t make much sense.)
I wanted to be independent so that I could someday buy a house.
I went to work at Procter & Gamble because it was a big company with lots of opportunities… for promotion and for expansion.
I have for so very many years been investing my today in my tomorrow.
The “purpose” for my today, has for so many years been placed carefully somewhere beyond today’s reach.
If I wait to feel the joy of my success tomorrow, I will always be chasing it. Much like a dog chases its tail.
What if I lived today for today?
Our company has grown from $14 million in 2009 to $75 million today. And, today I am working to get it to $100 million. (I am fairly certain that when we get to $100 million, I will be working toward $200…)
When I work out today, I am thinking about the physical strength that I want to have tomorrow…
I truly think that is why I have forgotten so many details about my life… because I have spent so very many moments invested in the moments to come…
But tomorrow never comes…
And, if it ever did, it would look a lot like today ;-)
I need to separate my desire of becoming a better version of myself from my ability to feel the true joy of every moment.
I do that sometimes… but, not enough.
What if the problems that I solved today at work, I enjoyed today. What if I was less focused on the vision of who we were going to become and just focused on the integrity of the solution we are implementing right now?
What if when I hugged my wife tonight… I lost myself in the embrace and didn’t wonder if more was to come?
What if when I saw my boys today, I paused and just gazed in awe at the men that they have already become, and not at the men they are still becoming…
What if I lived today… for today?
What if my purpose today was to squeeze all of the joy that I could out of this very day, and not continue to invest today in some eventual joy to come tomorrow?
Would I notice the perfect weather this morning a little differently?
Would I notice the amazing energy of the sunrise as it hit my face driving East on 695?
Would I take pride in being the first one at the office?
Would I enjoy hearing the silence of the office and feel the joy of time and space to develop my plans for today more clearly?
Would I appreciate the people around me more for choosing to spend this day with me… and fighting the battles together that we will inevitably fight?
Would I take greater pride in smaller victories, and acknowledge the great effort from so many in every small advance?
There is nothing wrong with having today build on yesterday.
There is nothing wrong with having today work toward a larger end.
But, today, in and of itself, could be my purpose.
Today, I can feel joy and success and happiness… can’t I?
Today comes with challenges... sometimes small challenges, sometimes big ones. Some days come with great pain and great sadness. Some days we do fight simply to get through them... but I am convinced that suffering and joy are two sides of the same coin. That they can both coexist, and do.
Some of the days that define me... some of the days that I do remember in great detail, where days of great sadness and loss... and for some reason I remember them with great clarity and love.
Of course, I have enjoyed so very much of my journey, but I guarantee you, not nearly as much as I could have.
I have enjoyed much of my journey, but in my mind, I am always chasing tomorrows…
And, I am getting tired of chasing tomorrows. Because tomorrows never come.
And, when they do… they look a lot like today ;-)
So, what if I made today the day I live for?
I would no longer be chasing life, but rather fully experiencing life…
I would no longer be expecting joy to come, I would be neck deep in it…
I would no longer be waiting for today to end so that I was one day closer to tomorrow… I wouldn’t want today to end, because I wasn’t done living it yet…
What if I lived today for today?
Grateful for each and every moment…
Today can certainly build toward something bigger, but my focus, my purpose, my attention can be right here... in the middle and the joy of it.
I can always become a better version of myself... but I can apply it the lessons and take pride in them today, and not wait till tomorrow.
One of my colleagues just walked in, "GOOD Morning! How are you this morning?" I asked. "Living the dream!" He said...
It made me smile... INDEED... living the dream!
I’m going to try it… I am going to live today for today...
Because for 48 years now, tomorrow has always been a day away…
And, I am tired of chasing it…
And, unlike my college days, I am now committed to learning from my experiences…
And, joy and success and love and happiness are all around me…
Right here… right now…
What if I lived today for today….
Everyday?
Yours in harmony,
Nestor