There is a material difference between
TOLERANCE and ACCEPTANCE.

Some people will argue that both are similar -

but the difference is paramount.

Let's use an example where a person gets promoted that you don't like nor think should be promoted...

TOLERANCE means you ALLOW IT TO EXIST but CONTINUE TO WISH IT DIDN'T

That shows through in how you think, in how you act, in how you behave...

You exclude that person from meetings  and communication that they should be in...

You take every opportunity to voice your dissent with that person's role and position...

You often, in tolerance, ALLOW it to exist, because you are POWERLESS to change it.

And, that is meaningful because it means that you use your POWER wherever you can to undermine it - with "good" intent because you are acting in your perceived "good" of the company... but it's not.

TOLERANCE happens when you have no choice, but to quit or move forward with the decision as it stands.

TOLERANCE SUCKS!  It sucks for you.  It sucks for the person or situation you are tolerating. And, it sucks for the company.

ACCEPTANCE, on the other hand, takes a very meaningful step forward.

ACCEPTANCE, in this example, means that even if you would not have made this decision promoting this individual on your own, you ACCEPT it... you EMBRACE it... YOU ASSUME IT AS YOUR OWN.

That is NOT easy... but it is EXTREMELY POWERFUL for you, for the individual in the new role, and for the company.

When you ACCEPT, and you EMBRACE... you COMMIT to making it successful.  You CO-OWN the success of the decision.  You support and actively work to make the individual thrive in their new role.

Now, I am not saying that if there are material examples of non-performance or issues that they are not addressed or communicated.  THEY ABSOLUTELY SHOULD BE.   But, I am saying that IF YOU CHOOSE TO ACCEPT DECISIONS - your feedback to everyone will be extremely valued.  IF YOU TOLERATE and then choose to speak to issues of performance or fit - they are dismissed because you "never really bought into the idea / person and are determined to see it fail."

Ironically, ACCEPTING DECISIONS and owning their success gives you tremendous power & influence to alter them, to evolve them... TOLERATING DECISIONS makes you very often powerless to affect them due to your perceived bias.

And, it's really difficult to fake "ACCEPTANCE"... Accepting things requires you to open your mind, to accept you may be wrong, to embrace that you are not all powerful, to be humble... 

TO ACCEPT demands that you PUT YOURSELF SECOND to your preferences!  ACCEPTANCE requires HUMILITY.  A critical trait in my opinion, in effective leadership.

TO TOLERATE is based on an inability to set aside the belief that you are smarter than everyone around you... and given the chance, YOU"LL SHOW THEM!

The difference between TOLERANCE and ACCEPTANCE is extremely meaningful and impactful at all levels of the company.  And, the higher the level of the individual choosing to tolerate or accept, the more meaningful... As "TOLERANCE" vs "ACCEPTANCE" at the highest levels of leadership trickle down to divided companies, and entire groups of people acting on direction to undermine the direction a company has set for itself.

It is not a coincidence, that Pat Lecioni, in his book "The Advantage" calls out ALIGNMENT OF LEADERSHIP as the number ONE priority of any healthy company.

THINK ABOUT IT...

Where do you stand?

Do you TOLERATE the decision your company, division, departmet makes, or do you ACCEPT and EMBRACE them?  DO YOU CHOOSE TO OWN them and make them successful?

Life is short...

Tolerance SUCKS for everyone...

It has a place in republics, but should not have a place in companies.

Life is short...

If you can't get yourself all the way to acceptance, find a company where you can... The difference is life altering - for you and all of those around you!

TOLERANCE is a form of disharmony - because its a state of wishing you didn't have to...

ACCEPTANCE is a form of harmony - because its a state of embracing and owning the IS...

Choose ACCEPTANCE... 

In harmony,

Nestor

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